I wrote a little while ago about having a daughter and being afraid of having only one girl without being able to give her a sister. I’ve thought more about this and I’ve decided that not having a sister may not be as horrible as I thought… as long as you have great sisters-in-law!
I have two sisters whom I love dearly, one older and one younger. My husband has two younger brothers who are twins. He also has an older step-brother and a younger step-sister. All of his brothers are married. (This leaves me with one official sister-in-law and three “co-sisters-in-law” if you want to get really technical. I’m going to just call them all my sisters-in-law, for simplicity’s sake.) My husband’s sister is awesome and because I’ve known her since she was around 10, I naturally felt like she was my second little sister even before Mike and I got married. This post is more about my other sisters-in-law. The ones who joined the family via marriage to one of my crazy brothers-in-law. I have known B since I was a kid, been around M only a handful of times and met F for the very first time last weekend.
It was on our way back from our weekend trip to San Diego and Mexico on Monday that I realized how lucky I am to have this whole separate group of sisters. Not only are they all very cool and sweet and funny, they have the ability to understand a totally different side of my life that my birth sisters never would be able to. Just as my sisters are the only people who know what it is like to be raised by my parents, what our household traditions are, and what our childhood was all about; my sisters-in-law are the only other people who know what it is like to marry into my husband’s family. They too know our funny and wild Father-In-Law and our even tempered and laid back Mother-In-Law who handles all of the family “crazy” so well. We share the goofiness and sometimes frustration of dealing with these brothers that we’ve chosen to marry. They share my nieces and nephews with me, the aunties and uncles, our Grandmas-In-Law (Hi Ma! Hi Grandma Rambow!) It is really, really nice. I think about how lonely I’d be if I was the only wife. Ugh. Just awful! I feel like we are alike enough and different enough to give my Mom-In-Law a good range of personalities to deal with. I’m sure none of us are 100% good enough for her baby boys, (I can’t imagine any girl would be wholly acceptable for mine!) but I think together we hit the 99.9% mark.
Between the four brothers there have been plenty of possible wives over the years. I don’t believe it was just dumb luck that they ended up marrying such great women. We are all responsible, hard working, fun loving, caring and smart. There isn’t a catty, bitchy, lazy or trashy lady amongst us (Unless it is me, and in that case I’m blissfully unaware.) So, that means they have the good sense to recognize a good woman when they see one. Probably because of all of the good women who helped raise them. You see, this kind of thing has a way of coming full circle! I am no longer worried about having an only daughter. I have no doubt that my sons will grow to recognize great women, marry them and provide my possible future daughter with two great sisters-in-law. If I never have that daughter, I will just look forward to having awesome daughters-in-law. (I feel it necessary to point out that the initials of my sisters-in-law and myself – B.A.M.F. – are also an acronym for something else. Google it, because I try not to use the F word too much here… and I do feel like we are BAMFs… ok, I might be the trashy one. But just a little bit. Because of my potty mouth.)
I look forward to the time that the four of us can get together with a few bottles of wine and chat it up properly. Many miles separate us all, so I hope that it will be possible some day. Until then, I’ll stay thankful for Facebook and road trips!