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Yesterday, I posted The Top Ten Ways My Husband Annoys Me and since today is his birthday, I had already planned to post this list. So, here are the Top Ten Reasons My Husband Is THE BEST (ever in the whole, whole, whole wide world. Ever.)
 
1. He would NEVER intentionally hurt me.
Physically, mentally, emotionally, never in a million years. He would never even think of it. I have seen my husband angry. I’ve seen him frustrated. I’ve picked at him and annoyed him during stressful times where he might be most likely to snap and throw me in front of a bus, and he has never so much as threatened to hurt me. Fear is not an issue in this marriage.
 
2. He is the most loyal man ever.
My husband likes to look at pretty women. He can admire a great body, beautiful face and he has zero problem pointing out a fantastic ass (to me, over a romantic dinner or on my birthday…whenever.) but that is where it ends. I completely trust that I will never come home to him in bed with another woman, or worry about where he’s at after work. He hates cheating, he would never want to be cheated on and therefore would never cheat. Period.
 
3. He is very understanding when I am being irrational.
I have a tendency to be a bit…sensitive. I’m tough too, but sometimes things just break me down and I can’t stop myself from crying. Many times, I cry over pretty silly stuff, like movies or blog posts. When my son fell off the couch and hit his head, He was completely fine after two minutes and I sobbed for the next ten. Our first night home from the hospital, I lay my darling boy sweetly sleeping in his crib (two feet from my bed) and climbed in next to my husband…then cried pitifully about how much I MISSED my baby and how he was so far away. Through all of these outbursts, my amazing guy holds me and gently laughs and tells me it will all be okay. Then kisses my head and calls me his little sensitive bear. He never makes me feel stupid for being so crazy.
 
4. He encourages me to spend money on myself.
While other husbands might complain that their wives waste money on clothes and shoes, spend too much on the kids or buy stuff they don’t really need; my husband is telling me to please go buy myself a new pair of jeans. Go ahead, get those shoes! He gets mad at me for being cheap! I annoy him to end by walking around the store for an hour looking for the perfect shoes to go with the dress in my hand, only to find them, decide they are too expensive, then put the dress back, and leave the store empty handed. Mind you, he isn’t actually with me when I do this, but when I come home with nothing and tell him that the old dress in my closet will work fine, he throws his hands up in frustration.
 
5. He is funny.
Really, really funny. He has a great sense of humor and is really good at keeping things light on a regular basis. He is silly and goofy but only at the right times. He isn’t one of those guys that can’t have a conversation without being stupid. He makes friends easily because he immediately jokes around with people. I don’t know how anyone deals with a stuffy, overly serious man…I’m so grateful that I don’t have to! When he read my top ten list of ways that he annoys me, he text me: “I want a divorce, you mean bitch.” Pretty F’ing hilarious.
 
6. He is an awesome Daddy.
Since day one he has changed diapers, wiped up vomit, held, changed, snuggled and soothed our baby boy. He feels comfortable taking him out alone, he stays home with him easily and he never makes child rearing out to be “women’s work.” He hugs and kisses our boy almost as much as I do and loves making him laugh, no matter what he has to do. He sings the craziest songs, dances around, uses funny voices, what ever it takes to get a smile or a giggle. He also thinks that everything our son does he does better than any other boy on the planet. He’s cuter, funnier, smarter, more athletic, and has a better sense of humor than any other child. Fact. Just ask Daddy!
 
7. He not only tolerates, but genuinely loves my family.
He doesn’t show his love by being quiet and polite and formal with them. He shows them that he truly loves them by being exactly the same as he is with his own family. He is completely comfortable; affectionate, truthful and blunt. He may not always be the most popular with them but it is because he is honest and genuine. There are no awkward “in-law” feelings between my people and my husband and that makes life a whole lot easier.
 
8. He puts us first.
There are many people in my husband’s life that he loves. He has a close knit family, a ton of friends and acquaintances, plus he is devoted to his job and has a few hobbies as well. Every single one of those things takes a backseat to me and our children. He focuses on what is going to be best for our little family, no matter what opinion others may hold. If a family need pops up, he selflessly cancels his plans. Decisions in our marriage are made within our marriage. Parenting decisions are made between the only two people parenting our children. I’m his number one and he’s my number one. Simple. As. That. There have certainly been times when others have tried to horn in on our choices and attempt to have a say, and they are quickly and unapologetically shut down. We understand that at the end of the day, we (and only we) are responsible for the success of our marriage.
 
9. He’s a dreamer.
We can spend hours talking about things like what we would do if we won the lottery, or what we will be doing in five, ten or twenty years. He dreams big, he wants better and is not willing to settle for good enough. He doesn’t give up and reassures me that everything will be just fine eventually…and he’s been completely correct so far.
 
10. He is all about comfort.
Some may see this as a down side, I am not one of those people. I can seriously do anything in front of him and not feel embarrassed or self conscious. He has seen me at my best and at my worst and loves me the same. He’s completely comfortable with normal functions of the human body, and has made me that way as well. Burping? Whatever. Farting? No problem. Ran out of toilet paper while pooping? He’s on it. Need tampons? He’ll haul the biggest box of whatever absorbency you need right up to the counter and carry them out with no bag. Like a boss. If there was any shred of mystery left, it was quickly evaporated after childbirth. He was there for every gory detail and never made a disgusted face. (At least not that he allowed me to see.) Nothing can shake this man.
 
And these are only the obvious reasons. I’m a lucky, lucky, lucky lady!
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